Why do I do this to myself?

Why do I allow a certain family member to continue to hurt my feelings? Why do I try and let go of the past(which I have done), try and reach out, and feel rejected, yet again...over and over and over. I am really hurt right now by someone in my family that has hurt me over and over and yet I always come back to this person because I desperatly want a relationship with this person. I know how short life is...I realized that this year with the sudden passing of Darryl's dad. He was still so young and I always thought he was as strong as an ox. I always made those kind of comments to Darryl-how his Dad always looked so healthy. He was tall, had a healthy tan, he was stocky...He always *seemed* so strong...but he wasn't and we sadly lost him this year. I know Darryl misses him terribly and feels a sadness for not being able to see him more. May you rest in peace Harold and I know we will all be together again one day.
I took this as a lesson for me to try and maintain and nuture relationships more with family. I really feel like I've tried to reach out to both my immediate family as well as family through marriage. I wish we all lived closer because I would *LOVE* to live near Darryl's mom and sisters and brother. His mom has such a peace, wisdom and humor I love and really enjoy talking with her. His brother and sister have new babies that we rarely get to see and that saddens me but they are always in our thoughts and we talk about them frequently. My side of the family I rarely see and would love to see my brothers more-they are almost grown and I feel like I've missed out on so much.
But in saying this, in reaching out this year, one family member continues to reject me (unless it's convenient for him/her). This person doesn't DESIRE a relationship with me or my family. It hurts my feelings that he/she continues to choose THINGS over family...unless it suits him/her perfectly. That experiences, traditions, and family moments mean less to this person than money and experiences that he/she will enjoy. I feel like this person always chooses himself/herself first and if everyone is along for the ride then fine, otherwise he/she isn't going to do what YOU or ANYONE else wants.
I got some roundabout news today that hurt my feelings. Not from this person but someone close to him/her. Trust me, it's not surprising but it still hurts...I really believe this person doesn't care about me or having a relationship with me...I was rejected and replaced years ago and nothing has changed...and it breaks my heart...for I long for family...I really do...
I don't know...I just really had to get this out.
I love my family, all of my family, and pray that the Lord will someday bring us all together but today I'm sad...
Am I unrealitic in what I think family should be? I certainly didn't have an ideal family situation growing up and maybe I romantized what family should be like in my mind...I don't know...
In saying all this, I do have many things to be thankful for...my faith, my husband, my children, and I do believe I have some family members that really do care...

Edited to add: I don't say all this to air out my families "dirty laundry" so to speak. It's my blog, my journal and I want these moments-the good and bad, to be remembered and reflected upon. I truely believe all of these moments are used for HIS glory(meaning the Lord)and am thankful that through everything my heavenly Father never rejects me, never betrays me and always chooses me as his daughter...I couldn't ask for anything better...